Surly Old Man

I've become surly with old age. My neighbors play their music too loud, so I yell at them. I stare at groups of young people walking in front of my house, poised to reprimand them for stepping on my lawn. I have a pension that I'm paying into, and I'm not afraid to tell anyone about it. So I'm becoming a surly old man. And with age, comes introspection. Regrets, doubts, philosophical debates inside my head (and occasionally outside as well). A whole bunch of that stuff, for sure. It's as if I needed therapy at one point, and never really did it, so I just vomit out stuff when it comes to me and say "to heck with the circumstances -- I'm old. I don't care." So today I'm at work, and I get a text message from my wife saying "I am in orientation with *insert name of guy I went to high school*'s wife." After sending a joke, since he shares a name with someone famous, I followed with "Or is it that other guy I went to high school with? He was a douchebag." And yes, he really WAS a douchebag. I'm using the term was, since I haven't seen or interacted with him in over 15 years. He could have found Jesus, for all I know, and that would be awesome. But all of my memories of him are tied into his douchebaggery from when we were kids. Seriously, if Ed Hardy shirts existed in the early - mid-nineties, I'm pretty sure this guy would have had a closet full of them. Did I say he was a douchebag yet? I love that term. It's my favorite insult ever. I think I'll be using that when I'm REALLY old, when my grandkids have to Google it to find out what it is. And then they'll wonder why the senile old man is referring to people as feminine hygiene products. Ah, kids. They just don't get it sometimes. Anyway, so my wife says this guys wife is pretty nice, and reassures me that yes, we all grow up, and change, so to knock off my insistence that he was a douchebag, and that even though his wife is nice, some girls dig jerks, I should give him the benefit of the doubt. And I will. I guess. If I have to. But this got me to thinking. (introspection again) Would I be friends with the people I am friends with now, if I knew them in High School? I'm still the same person I was back then, perhaps with a little bit more confidence, a little more comfort in my skin (well, there's a lot more skin now, so I guess I needed to stretch out,) I have less hair and I'm a little more boisterous than I used to be. Back then I was a longhaired kid who dressed grunge before it was cool, mostly out of necessity and not out of a desire to be hip. I spent most of my nights holed up in my bedroom and didn't do anything considered social, with church being the only exception. Heck, these days the only contact I have with people from high school that aren't my wife or related to me is limited to occasional Facebook postings. But that's beside the point - some of my friends now were jocks in high school. Or had a lot of friends. Or were really good at math, or in a band. They can fix stuff. Stuff I never could do. So I wonder, if we were all placed back in high school, would they hang out with me? Would I want to hang out with them? Would I label them douchebags just for a few minor, yet scarring incidents in gym and the lunch room? And that's the benefit of growing old. I can be as surly as I want, but I can still be all deep and philosophical. I'm sure Mr. I-Share-A-Name-With-Someone-Famous is probably a pretty decent guy with the same concerns and fears we all have as we head the short road to 40. Will I save enough money for my kids college? Will I have enough to retire on? Did I turn down the thermostat before I left the house? And yet, I still can't help but call him the dreaded D-Word. Some people grow up. But I, I guess I grew...sideways.

Pressurized Creativity #1 - Macho Quest

A Prologue Brevity is the soul of wit, right? At least, that's what Bill Shakespeare said. Since he's been dead for a few centuries, and a lot of old dead guys seem to know what they're talking about, or since we seem to take the words of old dead guys far more serious than old alive guys (I'm looking at you, Andy Griffith), I figured I would start my latest blog with something from an old dead guy. It really has no application to this particular post, but hey, it popped into my head, so I decided to write it down. Anyway, things pop in my head on a regular basis. Moreso over the past few months, for reasons I can't quite nail down, but it might just be the fact that when I'm at work, the biggest challenge that I have creatively is figuring out what to eat for lunch. It may be that I haven't actually utilized all of my creative potential, or it could be that, not unlike a valve under pressure, if it begins to get TOO MUCH pressure, without being released once in a while, it begins to steam a bit, on the verge of explosion. That could be a good thing or a bad thing, or the explosion creatively could just be a waste of what could be valuable stuff, sort of like the Deep Sea Horizon Oil Rig. An unmitigated disaster, by all accounts. So this pressurized creativity has been leaking out lately, and I'm having a really hard time getting everything down, or even finding a direction for what ideas I do seem to remember. I figured that if anything, I can try to write them down here, and maybe revisit them if I have the time and resources to actually pull them off. Either way, at least they...GET OUT OF MY HEAD!! Actual Post: So this idea has been knocking around for a while, predominately as a goal for my own personal enlightenment, but now it's got the potential to be something creative and entertaining for all involved. The idea? A Macho Quest. I've made it no secret that I grew up without a dad. Over the years, I've had men come into my lift and fulfill that role to an extent, but 18 years without someone to guide me in some of the Ways of Men can hardly be made up in a handful of years, no matter the depth of the relationship. There's just some things that need to be learned hands on, when the opportunities come up. So anyway, there's a lot of macho things I don't know how to do, or don't know anything about. A short list: Home Repairs Car Repairs Sports Hunting How to Fight And Much Much More. So I came up with an idea - while I need to learn this stuff anyway, I thought it would make a great reality/educational show. Follow along as this dude who needs to learn what it takes to be a dude, learns what it takes to be a dude, from dudes who are experts on being a dude. Seriously - how funny would it be, for a viewer especially, to watch as I learn how to change my own oil? Or if I learned how to box? Even better - the chance of electrocution as I change out ceiling fans in my house? There's a GOLDMINE of possibilities there. Plus, I'm sure I'm not the only one who needs to learn some stuff about being a dude. Heck, there's a ton of stats out there that show I'm not the only dude who grew up without a dad. I can't be the only one who still has issues trying to figure out to, say, fix a sink drain. Viewership is a given, I'm sure. Anyway, this is a personal quest - for sure, I'm learning this as I go. I just think it would make for great TV, since I have a tendency to be a clutz and I often find myself hilarious. The chance of me actually getting it on video though? Probably slim. I just think it's a good concept, that's why I wrote it down. Maybe someday....

Post #666 - The Posting of The Beast!

I've officially written 666 posts on this ol' blog, in the past 8 years or so. That's insane. I haven't posted anything in a long time, but here's an update on the Vizio thing: They fixed my television. It wasn't 24 hours after Consumerist posted my story before a representative from Vizio called me to "work something out" - ie - they were in damage control mode. Within a week or so, my television was repaired, and working fine in my office. There was a lot of debate both here, and at the Consumerist site, regarding my intentions when posting my "open letter". The posts ranged from supportive and understanding, to outrageous and insulting. In order to clear things up, I'll say this, as the final word on my issue with Vizio. My TV was barely 18 months and it broke. I was upset. I wrote a letter to customer service - the same letter that I posted on this blog - and received a response that read "Please call us so we can resolve this issue." When I called, I was told, and I quote "It's electronics, what do you expect.", and reminded that in order for Vizio to repair my television, I would have to shell out $200 - $300. Almost half the cost of the television. And so, I went public. I wasn't about to pay that for a television to be fixed, and if I couldn't get them to stand behind their product, I wanted to serve as a cautionary tale for prospective buyers of Vizio televisions. I forwarded my letter to Consumerist with that intent in mind. I did nothing with the expectation of receiving something from Vizio - I'd been down that road and was shafted. Did I get something from Vizio? Yes. I got my television fixed -- something that they should have done in the first place. Will I buy another Vizio product? Nope. Nada. Never. There's an old saying about fooling me once, and fooling me twice. And I'm no fool. Thank you to Vizio for the repair. Thank you to the readers of the Consumerist that supported me. And to those of you who DIDN'T support me, God Bless.

An Open Letter to William Wang, CEO of Vizio TV

Dear Mr. Wang, In June of 2008, my wife purchased a 32" Vizio Plasma television for me for Father's Day. Needless to say, I was very happy, having wanted to make the switch to HD and finally being able to do so. Our current television was over ten years old, so I was looking forward to a long relationship with this television and Vizio. Around December of 2009, I noticed some odd behavior from the television. It would flash on, and then off, and then on again. As though it were like a car having trouble turning over to start in cold weather. The problem was annoying in the beginning, and worsened over the last few weeks. Until tonight, when it refused to turn on at all. Once the holidays were over, I called technical support, to find out just what I could do to either fix the television myself, or what you could do to stand behind your product. The customer service agent, who was very polite, informed me that since my warranty had been expired, and that my wife hadn't purchased an extended warranty upon purchase, that it would cost me anywhere from $200 - $300 to repair what was determined, to be something involved with the power supply. Since my wife paid only around $650 for the television, I was shocked that the repair bill would be anywhere from 1/3 to 1/2 of what we paid for it. I understand that electronics and their components aren't cheap, but still - given the way that prices on LCD's and Plasma televisions have dropped over the past 18 months, I could just as easily purchase a new television for just a little more than the cost to repair my old new one. That being said, I'm very disappointed in your product, and your warranty policies. I look at televisions like other major appliances - something that will last a long time, and when it breaks down, it will be from old age. If your product can't withstand average use for 18 months, I don't believe that I can trust it to last for the time that most other appliances should, and given the financial investment involved, I'm sure you can understand my disappointment. At this point, due to financial reasons, I am going to have to go back to my now 11 year old television and use that, until I can afford to purchase a new LCD TV, which, given my understandable disappointment with Vizio, will be another brand. Thank you for your time. Jeremy Zehr Caledonia NY UPDATE 2/10/10 Approximately 24 hours ago, a link to my blog was posted on The Consumerist. I had sent this to Ben Popken when I posted it, but had actually forgotten that I'd done so. Several anonymous commenters have lambasted me, claiming that I did this purely expecting something for nothing from Vizio -- which couldn't be further from the truth, but what can you do, the Internet is full of trolls who have nothing better to do than assume the worst. However, I did just get off the phone with a Sabrina Van Gilder, who works in the Customer Service Department at Vizio. This entire situation has taken an unexpected turn, which I will keep you abreast of in the days to come.

Professionalism, at it's BEST!

So it's been about a year since I left my previous full-time job and became a stay at home dad. In that year, I've been able to do a little bit of freelance work, a good amount of pro bono work, and continue to seek freelance opportunities. But as it stands, at this time, I really don't have to look for a full time job. The money that I would make at any job, would most likely go to childcare, and the idea of investing money into someone else to invest in my children just doesn't make any sense to me. (Just to clarify, Michelle and I aren't rich by any means, we're just trying to be frugal right now) Needless to say, I am still searching for freelance opportunities, which led to me receiving this e-mail this morning: HI Jeremy Unfortunately you don't fit in with our (insert generic sounding marketing business name) Team! I was just testing you to see if you were a fit with our company when I said that I can't pay you at the beginning. Your response is why you don't have a job and your setting at home make nothing. I'm sure you all want to know the back story, right? Last Friday, I was trolling Craigslist, looking for gigs either in the video or graphic design business. Thus far, I haven't had much luck, but can't blame a guy for trying. I came across this ad: Sounds pretty good, they have all of the necessary equipment, and will "pay by the job". Just the kind of opportunity that a guy like myself could use. After an e-mail, and a phone conversation, it was determined that the best time for me to meet with him would be Tuesday, after he and his business partner announced the launch of their new business. He thought it would be a good opportunity for me to meet his business partners and get familiar with their product. (Little did I know that this was a classic move made by most multi-level marketing groups to get people in the door to muscle into buying into their latest "product", or as I like to call them, scams) After consulting with a close friend (I had a little bit of a gut feeling that this may be a bad idea), I decided I would go to the meeting, not make any financial commitments (obviously) and see what kind of work they would need. So I went to the meeting, spent an hour listening to a very good salesman tell myself and a hand full of others about a "great" opportunity. The gentleman I spoke with seemed fine with me not buying into the program, and that I was only there to provide graphic design and multimedia services. When the meeting was over, I spent the next two hours watching the two business partners go to work on the hard sell - pushing pretty much every other person in the room to pay their $50 and get in on the "ground level". I just kind of stood in the corner, waited for the room to clear, and by noon, I was finally sitting down to discuss the graphic needs of my potential client. He gave me a pretty good idea, but I had to get out of there. Michelle had to work, but I promised that I would contact him to discuss further what they needed. So I waited a day, and e-mailed him this yesterday: Thank you for taking the time to meet with me yesterday. I'm excited to be able to do the work that you need for you in a timely manner. I was going to give you a call yesterday afternoon, but I had some family things come up that required my attention, and once I could have called you, it was probably too late in the evening. Anyway, a couple of questions before I get started: 1) I know you mentioned that you needed them as soon as possible, but would you like to set a hard deadline schedule up with me? I can probably get you a few comps by Friday (10/23), I'll give you the weekend to try to fine tune what you would want them to say or look like, and most likely, be able to finish them and get them sent to ******* by the middle of next week (10/28, 29), if things go smoothly. 2) Is this a contract job? Or is it a job that will require me to fill out the necessary forms for taxes and stuff? (ie W2's and stuff) 3) Speaking of taxes, did you have an idea for what your price range is for something like this? Business card design is typically a $100 - $125 charge, depending on the detail and amount of work required, on a contract basis. If you'd like to work with me on an hourly rate, the price may be negotiable. If this is a contract job, we'll have to agree contractually on a pay schedule, usually within 30 days of completion of work. I look forward to working with you - let me know when you'd like me to get started. Simple questions, professional enough, right? And here comes the scary part....his response: (in part) We will contract with you per job but for now your will have to do it very cheep! The first few jobs will have to be for Free so we can see if your work is acceptable to us and if we can work together. We can pay you a small fee at the beginning and then give more as time goes on. I can help you get better paying work from my clients like Bill as payment (commission) for doing our work. I always give compensation in some form for the work people do for me. Give me a chance to prove my last statement. Let see some work from you and then I'll recommend you to all my clients. Cheap? Free? I understand working cheap. I have no problem working cheap, but for FREE? In exchange for referrals? Is this guy nuts? No, that wasn't my response, the answer to, what he referred to as a "test" was this: Thank you for your response, but I don't believe that it will be wise for me to go any further with this. I cannot do any work for free, and while it's nice to have referrals, I prefer them come from paying clients. I am leery of working with anyone who believes that referrals are an acceptable form of compensation, given that not every referral results in a paying client. I've done my share of free or cheap jobs in the past, and will probably do more in the future, but only for clients that I have an established relationship with or for causes that I believe in - and at this point your company is neither. I wish you all the best in the future. Guess I failed his test. Although, I am curious, what would he have said if I said "okay, I'll work for free for now..." I'm sure we all know what would have happened. If you're a freelancer, be wary of who you deal with. Let them know up front what you expect as compensation. Don't allow them to pay you with pipe dreams, because you'll end up getting ripped off for your hours of hard work. There are two other scary parts to this story: 1) This guy spent a lot of time referring to my faith, and the faith of others in the room, as though God had brought us all together somehow. Now that I think about it, it's a scary thing when someone preys on your belief system, hoping to use that as a weapon to pull you into working for them. 2) There was a young kid, fresh out of college, who was there to pursue the video aspect of their creative needs. I hope he has someone that can help him make the right decision professionally, and not waste his time with these scam artists. If you're good at what you do, you should get paid for it. Working for free is for non-profits, and to an extent, friends. Some business people need to understand it. But now, back to that e-mail - here's the response I would love to send: My grandfather once told me, that if you pull a dogs tail, no matter how sweet they may be, you'll instantly discover their true nature. My unwillingness to work for free was the pulling of your tail, and your true nature was revealed to be that of an unprofessional bully. The most amusing part of your response was when you took the parting shot about me sitting at home making no money. I liken it to when my son calls me mean, or poopyhead, if he doesn't get his way. To the person saying the insult, there's a perception of power. To the intended target, though, it only solicits laughter. Thanks for the laugh. But will I send it? No. I'll just post it on my blog for my friends to see. The moral of the story? Be careful out there.

The 2996 Project - Remembering Carol M. Bouchard

For Project 2996 A little over 8 years ago, if you lived in the Warwick, Rhode Island area and had to go to the Emergency Room at Kent County Hospital, chances are, you may have been greeted by a smiling Carol Bouchard. I imagine Carol would, in a moment of your discomfort or great physical need, do her best to get you care as quickly as possible. I imagine, also, Carol coming home at night, sharing a meal with her husband Fred. Laugh about something funny that may have happened that day, or quietly dream with him about plans for the coming months, or years. One of those plans she had was to go to Vegas with her friend, a decision that was difficult for her, given her fear of flying. I imagine when she got on board American Airlines Flight 11 at Logan International Airport, that, despite her fears she was enjoying life, and looking forward to whatever the future might hold. Unfortunately, after only an hour or so of being in the air, Carol, along with 75 other innocent people, were robbed of their chance to live out their dreams, and their plans, as their airplane was hijacked and driven into the North Tower of the World Trade Center, thus beginning a day filled with nightmares and grief. To many, including myself (before today), Carol was just one face among a sea of faces in every 9/11 memorial tribute montage. But, to her husband, Fred, and to her other, many loved ones, Carol was someone who was stolen from them. A wife. A sister. A daughter. A friend. That smiling secretary who greeted so many at the desk of the Kent County Hospital ER, who brought comfort to those who needed it most, was gone, in the blink of an eye. It's on this day that, instead of imagining Carol and what she did day to day, what she dreamed of and planned to do with her life, I honor her memory, by saying that she won't be forgotten. Not today. Not every other day. Not Ever. Hat tip: This site and This site.

One Down, A Few More to Go...

It's taken me over a year to finally get off of my behind and update my website. But now - it's here. Well, most of it. I have a few kinks to iron out, but I have it uploaded and working, and you can check it out here. I'll take any advice I can get, so fire away. But there's a problem when I get a major project finished. There's a dozen more I have to get off the ground. Here are a few of them. A to do list, if you will. 1) Update my portfolio. There's one thing that designers and other artists have to do in order to maintain fresh - keep creating. I've been doing a bunch of things, mostly non-creative, but I really need to update my work portfolio - some new, versatile projects that showcase my skills. While putting my portfolio together, I noticed that I have a lot of solid poster design, so I'm going to have to focus on some layout and other design projects. Maybe I'll do a CD Cover design, and a magazine layout. They don't have to be real. They just have to be good. I also need to get some more web design under my belt. Which leads to my second item - 2) Learn CSS. I was talking with a designer friend about her website, which is stunning and makes me jealous and hate all of my work, but nonetheless, and she told me in order to use WordPress, I need to know CSS. So, at some point, I'm going to have to dive in. 3) Animation Reel. One of my goals as an artist is to develop a solid motion graphics reel. I have a few things, for it, but not enough yet. I have plenty of ideas, but now it comes down to finding the resources, and the time. Soon, I hope. One of the things I'm wrestling with though, is should I specialize? Should I focus on just one aspect, get really good at it, and hope to get a lot of work doing just that particular area? Or should I continue to diversify my portfolio, hoping that my versatility will open several doors? I'm not sure. Advice would be appreciated....